Beginnings are always like this.  One minute everything exists, the next  minute everything is lost. - Murakami's Blind Willow, Sleeping Willow (A 'Poor Aunt' Story) ~~~~~~~~~~ This is one of my all-time favourite quotes from Murakami. Given, I do not read many of his books but this is the one quote that has captivated me. The recent weeks have been nothing short of challenging. " God must be testing me, " is what I think to myself these days. Apart from everything I've had to deal with at home, I find myself questioning a friendshi p: Is it time to let go now? I remember how eminent friendship problems were back during my teens. Girls being girls, we exaggerated everything from the start to the end  – the discord, the hurt, the root problem  – and I was more than glad to be over and done with that phase when it ended. That's not to say I underestimate the severity of friendship problems but I believe most of us mature with time a...

Death sure is a strange thing. I don't necessarily fear it but I don't fancy being there when it happens, especially to a loved one. On some days, I think about the day God sliced Papa away from our lives. I would think about all the what-if s and could-be s if he was still around. I imagine he'd be the one changing light bulbs and assembling new cupboards, killing cockroaches and shifting furniture for us. On nights he returned home late from work, we'd have his signature fried rice for supper and durian parties during the season. I imagine he'd drop me off at school before work and on nights I came home a little too late, he'd grumpily offer to pick me up and then rain on me for staying out. Over time, those what-if s turned into wishful thinking. Truth is, I look into the mirror on some days and see the 7-year-old me still distressed, still confused, still naively thinking Papa is going to come home. Years later, when I finally began to understa...